So here goes: 2012 is finally here, and if you subscribe to the idea that the Mayan calendar is correct in predicting the end of the world, we are in for the final count. Now just to be clear, I’m not stashing away my end-of-times gear, and I’m also not thinking that I won’t live to see my 27th birthday in 2013 (yikes, 27?!? How did that happen??). But, whenever the joke is brought up in casual conversation after an apocalypse movie or general drunkenness, it makes me think what if the end of the world was approaching. When the question pops into my head, a huge neon sign with flashing lights blinks: THAT TOTALLY SUCKS!
It’s not that I’m scared of an apocalypse (a statement I may revise if zombies start wondering the streets), but the thought makes me profoundly aware that I’m wasting time. Loads of it. I’ve sputtered to a stop, stalled out in a beat up old truck as unreliable as Bella Swan’s “Rabbit” and instead of checking under the hood and fixing it up, I’ve pushed it to the shoulder and am thumbing my way for a ride. Now, several years ago, I was a part of dozens of school/community committees, bouncing around between honor societies, working and dreaming big.
Then I took a break. Gave my head a breather. Got married to my boyfriend of five years and had a daughter (who is, by the way, the light of my life). Now, I am 25lbs heavier than I ever was in college, working full-time with good people, going to bed too late, attempting to only remember what is absolutely essential for the day (which even so, my husband will tell you, doesn’t always work out), and watching too much bad tv. Now, within all that, I have wonderful times with my family—full of hugs, laughs, day trips, and sometimes too much Sangria. All in all, I am happier than I have ever been. God is good.
But if humanity is on the brink of extinction, then there are a few things I want to do before it’s all over and the fat lady sings. I want to do new things, long-dreamed things, impossible things. I want to kick procrastination’s ass and tackle every big and small dream. Want to see part of the list? Yes? Here goes (Sorry if you said “no”. You should’ve guessed it was a rhetorical question):
First off, don’t laugh.
Lose Weight. Yeah baby, I want a string bikini this summer. Now this includes many smaller goals, like drinking enough water everyday, working out regularly, eating vegetable (yuck!), etc. If I can do this, I am going SHOPPING. Motivating, yes? Of course J
Write and publish a novel. Yes, I am one of those crazy writing/reading people. I am a YA book junkie. My shelves are stacked with too many books. My husband bought me a nook tablet (Yes, I am in love) and I know he hopes the stockpile of pages I have will disappear or at least will not grow with this electronic gem to store books on. Now, I am loaded up with ideas. I am about ½ through a YA Urban Fantasy book and will be trying to finish it by April 6th. Why April 6th? Well, that is my sister’s birthday and she has announced that if the book is not finished by then, she will not speak to me until it is. My sister is a fun gal and I love her. Not talking to her will not be “bubbly-making” (if you don’t get the reference, run, don’t walk to your nearest bookstore to buy the UGLIES series). Apart from that, I have dreamed of sharing my stories with the world since I was a kid. This is one of those mega-dreams, people. I am holding tight to this one.
Do crap. Fun crap. Yes, I have a fabulously long list of firsts I want to do this year like snowboarding, skydiving, go to Europe, do a cruise, take the GRE (yeah, I know… but doctoral degrees in psychology—which WILL be fun--require them), do an ALL day SPA day, do a writing retreat, learn a song, sing it, and post it (I’m terrified of singing to people… and yeah, those of you who are like, “but you sang in public before!”, I’ll say “yeah”, at the risk of nearly fainting and peeing myself. Ok, maybe not quite. Almost. Very, very close.) AND so many other things. As I check things off the list, I’ll update/review it here J
And finally, just be a better person. Smile more, whine less, pray more, procrastinate less, dream more. AND fight for those dreams. Turn off all electronics when my daughter wants to play, appreciate all the small, sweet things my husband does, when I say I am going to do something, do it FAST, don’t make excuses NOT MATTER WHAT, focus on my small place in the world and love it completely, but never stop reaching toward the stars (not over the bridge where the grass may or may not be greener) and finally never lose sight of what is important: my family and the love that knots us all together.
It is time: 2012, be ready. You are about to have the sense knocked into you as this 25 year old exhausted, working, mother of one angel, wife to one prankster, this young woman with weight to lose, dreams to achieve, and fun crap to do takes it all and manages it in a 24 hour day. Blogosphere: Be ready. I am going to fall on my ass a lot along the way. But, I’m pretty sure that it will be worth the bruises.